Once upon a time....

Once God used to live just in the marketplace, but the whole day, even in the night people were knocking on the doors and complaining about everything: "This is not the right kind of world you have created. Why is there so much sickness? If you are the creator, then why do you create bodies which are sick? Why is there old age, and why is there death?"

So people tortured him so much, the old story says, that he called a council of his angels and asked them, "I will either die out of this constant torture, or I will have to commit suicide! Can you tell me what I should do? These people don't leave me for a single moment and their demands are such that I cannot fulfill them. And there are millions of people shouting and angry because their desire has not been fulfilled, their prayer has not been heard."

So the angels thought. One angel said, "It is good if you move to Everest, the highest peak of the Himalayas."

God said, "You don't know it but I am omniscient, I know everything -- past, present, future. Soon there will be a man who will reach to the highest peak of the Himalayas. And once one man has found me, there will be buses and airplanes, and all kinds of vehicles. And they will make roads and hotels, and again there will be the marketplace. You don't understand: it will only be just a little peace for a short time. That won't do. I will have to change my place again."

So somebody suggested, "Why don't you move to the moon?"

He said, "You don't understand because you don't know the future -- just after Everest they are going to go to the moon. So I will have to change again. Show me something from where I have not to change!"

Then an old angel came close to him and whispered in his ear, "The only place man may never think of is within his own heart. You just sit there ..."

He has disappeared from everywhere. Perhaps you can encounter something of divineness in your own being. In your own life you may find something which is godly. You will not find God as a person, you will find a quality, a fragrance, a presence; a certain air, a certain energy which is not yours, which belongs to the cosmos.

Book: I Celebrate Myself: God Is No Where, Life Is Now Here by Osho

A 3D Reflection

I was sitting in class today, daydreaming of course. Hey, I had my part of the lab work done, what better to do than gaze silently at the window? So anyway....There's little me, wishing to be ubiquitous...and suddenly found myself, staring at the view.... and it was amazing, I had a fun little epiphany.

I saw all the layers in a 2D way at first...The reflection, the delicate glass, the parking lot...then a little field of grass with the occasional dirt spot and weed, then comes a chain-link fence topped with reminding barbed wire...just beyond that are deep rolling hills and finally the gray clouds dancing with the wind all across the vast sky.

All of a sudden it just expands and creates a story, a journey.

You walk up to that window and stare at the reflection of a face that was never yours, thinking is will take more strength to open that window than you possess, you use all your might, and it lifts free from the sill with unexpected ease.

Jumping out the window, you feel as if you are flying, rather than falling. Just as you begin to relax, you hit the asphalt bottom. So... you make your hopping barefooted way across that rough lot til you reach the cool, scratchy....yet soft...grass. What a relief.

Making your way across the drass you eventually hit this chain-link fence that had once seemed so tiny. Realizing there's no way around it you proceed to climb...one hand above the other...not too hard...

But then you reach the top... and there's no where to go... you're tangled in the wires with barbs picking at your body. But fortunately, you had learned previously, the secrets to maneuvering through such kinds of wire.

Finally, you make it safe to the opposite side and see these beautiful rolling green hills...You run up and down and up and down, up, faster, and down, faster, up....and you take off above the dancing clouds into the sky to brilliantly shine among the stars.....

And I thought....hey....this could be life.

"Life is just a chance to grow a soul." --A. Powell Davis

"True religion is real living; living with all one's soul, with all one's goodness and righteousness."--Albert Einstein

"People living deeply have no fear of death."--Anais Nin

(hehe, I know, I have a cheesy way of expressing these things)

1- Thirumandhiram

The One is He, the Two His divine Grace; in Three He stands, and witnesses in all Four. The Five He conquered, the Six He filled, and the Seven Worlds He pervades - manifesting the Eight. And so, in all things, remains.

An Auction...??

Our country is incredibly stupid.

So, one day, over there in the Iraq area, our people realize, "Oh, we're sitting on a pile of junk....what should be do about it?" 'Junk' = left over tomcat fighter jet parts.

"I don't know, Bob, what do you think?"

"Hmmm...we could recycle it.....? What do you think, Joe?"

"Naaaaaa......Let's hold an auction! moneymoneymoney."

"YEA!! that's a fantastic idea!"

"You're truly brilliant, Joe..."

(No no...I think the extent of their stupidity is what is truly awe-inspiring.) Now... Let's think.... who are the only people that would buy those things...? They're older, and no one flies those kind of planes anymore anyway, right?

Oh wait....there is one country....They'll surely use the parts....

AND that country just so happens to be the one who hate's us with a passion....One that we have a rather "unhealthy" past with (exp. the '79-81 Hostage Crisis). Also the one who is seemingly 'helping out' the Iraqi people who are against us, by bringing in their own trained 'militia revolutionaries' to kill our idiotic friends, Bill, Bob, and Joe. And "we" are only ready to devote approximately 15 seconds to informing the public about these implicit acts of war.

Now please please tell me that by holding this auction, we're not deliberately putting weapons into the hands of our enemy?

What is Hafiz telling us?

Into the mirror of my cup the reflection of your glorious face fell And from the gentle laughter of love, into a drunken state of longing I fell Struck with wonder by the beauty of the picture that within my cup I beheld The picture of this world of illusion from the reflection of my mind fell

From the house of prayer into the house of drink I fell not of myself From eternity it was meant to be you came to me and into drunkenness I fell

From the beginningless beginning beneath the veil your face was hidden well but upon those with love and wisdom a ray from your most glorious face fell

All this world, reflected wonder, wine and love and song, in which we dwell Is nothing but a fragment of the one whose reflection into my cup fell. What is Hafiz telling us?

Lov Maggi

Sufic Humor...

There was once a small boy who banged a drum all day and loved every moment of it. He would not be quiet, no matter what anyone else said or did. Various people who called themselves Sufis, and other well-wishers, were called in by neighbors and asked to do something about the child. The first so-called Sufi told the boy that he would, if he continued to make so much noise, perforate his eardrums; this reasoning was too advanced for the child, who was neither a scientist nor a scholar. The second told him that drum beating was a sacred activity and should be carried out only on special occasions. The third offered the neighbors plugs for their ears; the fourth gave the boy a book; the fifth gave the neighbors books that described a method of controlling anger through biofeedback; the sixth gave the boy meditation exercises to make him placid and explained that all reality was imagination. Like all placebos, each of these remedies worked for a short while, but none worked for very long. Eventually, a real Sufi came along. He looked at the situation, handed the boy a hammer and chisel, and said, "I wonder what is INSIDE the drum?"

Attain freedom from fear

How many of us are free from inner unrest, how many of us realize that fear is the main force behind this turbulence? Before we can begin to find peace within or without, we must gain freedom from fear.

This demon-fear must be vanquished.

SOmething....

Isn't this kinda cool?? ....peace....

Ugh....I need something to talk about....

"La Curacion del Sufrimiento"

"The Healing of Suffering" Punta de Vacas, 1969 (Mendoza, Argentina; Kinda reminds me of my childhood friend, Alan.)

http://cecio.krur.com/video/1969_puntadevacas.html

This is well worth 15 minutes of your time.

"Do not open false doors..."

Quote for the day

Children have neither past nor future; they enjoy the present, which very few of us do.

The way to heaven...

Oh how quick I am to be reminded of my past.....my "almost-mistakes"...

It is hard to see someone with so much potential....go down in such a way that was murder, not by himself, but by his past.

But weighing deeply on the other hand.....Why must God bring about such things to haunt me with? It is a good reality check....very good.....yet, very harsh.

I have a dream...

The Great Below

"Not only is another world possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing."

Arundhati Roy

Sad....

Something I find rather sad...

My youngest step sister stopped by the kitchen to get something to eat and told me she was watching a "Texas Roadhouse" marathon. So I asked this...rather young girl...if she reall ought to be watching a show like that.

Now, I've never actually seen the show, I've just heard things about it.

Anyway, she proceeded to defend the supposed acceptability for a girl of her age to watch a series like that. One line that sticks out in my mind, "Oh, but there's nothing bad in it. Like nobody getting raped or anything" "Oh?" "Well, I mean...there are some murders...but that's not that bad, and some of them are on accident." ....WHA? Are you trying to tell me, that someone killing another person isn't just as bad as someone raping a person? Someone killing someone else isn't as bad as say... lying?

Honestly speaking...Killing is just as bad, if not worse than a rape. AND in any case, they are both terrible! I don't know who on earth would tell a child that killing is "not that bad"......She's completely desensitized to death, violence, murder, racism, killing, war, rape, insanity, torture, to the extent that it hardly fazes her. Which could possibly be useful if she ever decides to become the most lonely, yet best soldier later in life....but I don't think that's her life goal.

It's just kind of sad.....these things.....just sad.

"Every revolutionary ends up either by becoming an oppressor or a heretic."--Albert Camus

"A sobering thought: what if, at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential?"-- Jane Wagner

"If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of it all. And so today I still have a dream." --'The Trumpet of Conscience'-Martin Luther King Jr.

Testimonials

"Melissa says:

January 14, 2007

This girl came into the world on her own timeline, with eyes that see more than most and the desire to be different. She is a bright shining star who chose to be here among us pebbles, so we can see how brilliance is formed, close up.

Oh, do I love her."

Aren't mother's wonderful? They have the ability to change your life forever in just a few words.

Children of Men

Jump

Don't surrender your loneliness

so quickly

Let it cut more deeply

Let it ferment and season you

as few human

or even divine ingredients can.

Something missing in my heart tonight

has made my eyes so soft... My voice

So tender,

My need of that which is deprived of me

That Absolute

Clear

with me always

but never see

Avoiding ?

glance.

Gone from me.

Finally? :P

Federer lost!!

...and to Roddick! (in the Australian Open)

"Paul"(aka...CB)'s mom

http://www.volunteertv.com/home/headlines/5114471.html

Just Listen...

It was a beautiful morning today. They said it's supposed to rain, but the skies are this brilliant limpid blue.

Lying in bed, with the sun's rays just beginning to touch my face, I started thinking... About everything I'm grateful for, about all my blessings...Being grateful for being able to be grateful. Being able to love that radiant sun, and appreciate it's awesome power, despite whether it's destructive or not.

Of course, about that time...reality starts to slink in again with its black tentacles. But I'm trying to be optomistic about it. Hey, I'm learning to trust myself, I'm getting much MUCH better at trusting. There's just a lot of big decisions...changes... I have to make soon. I'm dreading, yet hopeful. They'll turn out how they're supposed to...just have to put faith in that.

I just need to listen...just listen. As well as keep any external forces from penetrating my 'bubble' while I'm trying to listen so as to avoid any outside influence....because, we don't want to make any mistakes now, do we?

"Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right." --Isaac Asimov

Mad world

I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad...that the dreams in which I'm dyin' are the best I've ever had...

Is it true

Is it true.. sometimes it's okay to cry? Is it true that it makes everything better, makes you feel better?

OMAR!

"Diyarbakir, Turkey is a city where Kurds rule the streets but the Turks dictate the law. The Kurdish people in this south east Turkish city do not enjoy the same freedoms as their counterparts do further down south. In the Kurdish region of Iraq, the Kurdish flag flies high and many murals around the cities of Arbil and Dohuk tell stories of the Kurds. If any Kurd made a similar attempt in Turkey to document Kurdish history, they would be incarcerated. In the eyes of the Turkish Government, being a Kurd in Turkey is not a good thing.

I had the opportunity to walk the alleys of Diyarbakir, which are beautiful and haunting. These alleys are where the poor live and where I felt welcomed the most. The residents of these alleys go out of their way to make visitors feel welcomed and safe. Naturally, you can find the usual city scammer although this is not the norm here. Diyarbakir is a fairly large city with many historic sites that are a source of local pride. One of these is an immense wall that separates the alleys from the wealthier part of the city.

One of the locals that I will remember the most is Omar, the bell boy at Class Hotel. This is one of the only hotels in Diyarbakir claiming to offer Wi-fi where it actually works. Omar is a devout Muslim with nothing but love in his heart for all human beings including people he’s only just met, like me. He dreams of becoming an English teacher, but making only $120 a month with a family of six makes that very difficult. There is no time for school, only work. He asked me to tell everyone back in the states that not all Muslims are evil terrorists. I promised him I would, but could not guarantee the results.

It was very difficult for me to sit back and watch a healthy, intelligent man with so much potential catering to the rest of society which seemed to have no appreciation for him or his efforts. I did not want to waste another moment, so that same day my travel companion Regan and I purchased a laptop computer. We showed up at the hotel and put the computer on the counter. Omar looked at it, thinking we were simply showing off our computer. When Regan and I explained to Omar that it was for him to keep, to study hard and become a teacher, he did not know what to do. With tears in his eyes, he promised that he will become an English teacher. "

--By Walt Gaya http://www.michaelyon-online.com/wp/omars-side-of-the-wall.htm

Four letter word

I feel the need to write about the four letters I wrote on my flash paper on New Year's Eve.

F

E

A

R

Seems to be a regular topic around here, huh?

Yes, and the reason being, it's a creature I really struggle with. Have struggled with my entire life. Don't we all?

This four letter word is virtually the only thing that holds me down.

When I lit the paper and it vanished...it did seem to lift a weight off my shoulders. Although it did not make the fear magically disappear, it did help me in the way that works best for me, the way I can benefit (learn) more from. That is...leaving the fears, but adding bravery. Adding courage, strength, optomism....hope.

"The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature." --Anne Frank

"If your heart acquires strength, you will be able to remove blemishes from
others without thinking evil of them." --Mohandas K. Ghandi (aka (picky people)Gandhi...GAHN-DEE :) )

Poetry you can dance to

He whose head is in love's shade/ Beneath his feet will be paradise/ He whose head is in love's shade

Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ My shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow

With your head in love's shade come, my shadow/ With your head in love's shade come, my shadow/ Let my feet walk upon paradise, come my shadow/ Let my feet walk upon paradise, come my shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow

That friend who is like a fragrance /Whose language is like Urdu/ She is my evening and night, my universe/ She is my friend, my beloved, beloved/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow

Sometimes a hidden flower flaunts itself,/ If it lets off a fragrance then it comes into view/ Wear it like a sacred amulet, it will be like a religous verse/ Sometimes a hidden flower flaunts itself,/ If it lets off a fragrance then it comes into view/ Wear it like a sacred amulet, it will be like a religious verse

That friend who is like a spiritual leader/ She is my melody, she is my Quranic verse/ My melody, melody, my Quranic verse, Quranic verse/ My melody, melody, my Quranic verse, Quranic verse/ She walks like the morning dew, underneath her feet heaven moves/ Sometimes the tree branches, sometimes the leaves I search for traces of her in the air

With your head in love's shade come, my shadow/ With your head in love's shade come, my shadow/ Let my feet walk upon paradise, come my shadow/ Let my feet walk upon paradise, come my shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow

I am the admirer of her beauty, she is a wanderer like the daylight and shade/ She changes the color of her radiance, I am the barterer of color and beauty/ I am the barterer of color and beauty

He whose head is in love's shade, beneath his feet will be paradise/ Evening and night, my universe, that friend is my beloved, beloved/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow

With your head in love's shade come, my shadow/ With your head in love's shade come, my shadow/ Let my feet walk upon paradise, come my shadow/ Let my feet walk upon paradise, come my shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow

That friend who is like a fragrance/ Whose language is like Urdu/ She is my evening and night, my univers/e She is my friend, my beloved, beloved/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ My shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow/ Come, my shadow, shadow, shadow, shadow

--"Chaiyya, Chaiyya" -A.R.Rahman (sorry... I'm obsessed :P)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=MLPuBHqm3Os