A New Dawn

I haven't posted for a few days..I actually did try to write though. I'd type something up, and it just wouldn't come out the way wanted/intended it too. Maybe I'll do better this time.

Today's been a tough day. I've been tired, and have a shorter breaking point. I'm not starving myself of food or sleep on purpose. I dont eat much because now, to me, it takes a very long time before I find anything that looks remotely appetizing. I suppose I've got a loss of appetite because of the heat..but who knows. And the sleep..I dont know what's wrong with me there. I just have trouble sleeping now. Whether it be the dreams that I dont want to see, or developing insomnia, or stress, or the time change screwing my body clock up...or fear. I dont know, I wont jump to conclusions though. I tend to do that a lot.

You know, I was thinking..there is something that I really want to do..and somehow, feel that I should do. I want to learn to manipulate energy in other ways. I want to heal people in this way..from anything from emotional, to physical ailments. And I'll make a goal, I've got to heal x amount of people/times...before ever using it for myself. I think it's going to take a while to teach myself this..and to trust that it really works. But..maybe I ought to start with something a little simpler..as I dont know how natural any of this will come to me..maybe start with some pk or something. Which reminds me...of Criss Angel (Sarantakos)...after first seeing what he could do, ages ago..he managed to weasel his way into my list of hero's immediately. I have to say that he is an amazing artist full of talents that any one wishes to have. And of course, you cannot forget David Blaine, although David, I'd have to say isn't quite as remarkable..But they both have equally unique abilities and deserve support and praise for what they do. Bringing life from death. Showing the world what is possible. I honestly believe that not everything they do is an illusion..in fact..it may be the only 'real' thing in this world. I'm not entirely positive that these people know exactly what they are achieveing when they find a dead bird, and bring it back to life, translocate in an uncanny way, or when they levitate, walk on water...Magick= miracles, in my view.

I want to become more in tune with myself, the existence of this world, energy, truth, life, realms, planes, the universe..I want to learn..and then pass it on to everyone I meet, everyone I see, whoever I can... As it is above, it is below...I think I do believe in who and what Tuthmosis was and did. And not only him..I should not point to just one..He stepped up and said what many people thought. I think I do believe in 'As above, is below'. I want to sail the Nile River..ride the arc and sail the Sea of Stars...I want to become a part of it all..and I know, it takes work..it takes a lot of work. Things should not come as easy as they sometimes do on this earth. I know, it's unbelieveable..you've actually got to work, serve to make it. Not only this, "be good, and you wont go to hell"....It was never.. going to a temple and worshiping the god(s)...it was going to the temple (workshop) and working for the gods..serving them the Food. That's how you become like them. That's how you obtain your 'light body' ...(and might I had a little stickup for the egyptians, they were never as crude or satanic a people as they are made out to be..their plan always seems more comforting..more difficult, but more comforting..If you make it there, only to be lost among the stars..Horus will find you and bring you back to try again..He'll not leave you.) Sin..is simply not preparing your mind and body for the change and not serving/working for what you want..that's what sin originally meant..they knew you sinned because you got sick..because you got old and gray..No one has to get sick in this world. Yes, maybe viruses and germs and bacteria are out there..but they cant affect you unless you allow them to do so. It's..in a way, something we created ourselves. Why waste millions of dollars..thousands of peoples lives, trying to find the cure that is right there inside you all along. It is all inside you...the one place you'd never think to look for any of the answers we all seek.

I've gone off on my own little tangent of nonsensible things..I should probably stop, huh?